Alive & Thriving Chooseday Thoughts : Dealing with Loss 😭|| AATYr5 || Prompt A Day 😊

I feel strange today. I know it's Chooseday and I do remember to always choose happy. Yet something seemed to have flipped that made it all feel oh so wrong. I was happy when I got to finish earlier than usual last night. All seems to be going well, even with the kitties. However, it seemed all was not well like I thought.

Each morning I do a silent roll call of all the kitties and look for them. I like finding out where they like to lounge mostly. Lo and behold for the shock of my life when I found Nian lifeless on the homemade scratch box in the cats' room. She looked like she was just sleeping soundly. When I went to check on her, she was already stiff. She must have passed in the wee hours when I was asleep 'coz I remember saying good night to her. 😭

A throwback photo -- Nian just a kitten on the left with cat mom Grumpy. The latter's been missing for over a year now. She went outside and never came back. I honestly don't know if there was foul play involved, but Grumpy's five years old then and practically grew up outside. What are the odds she would lose her way? 🤔 Nian grew up inside mostly. I had to bring her and her siblings inside when Mom passed, as she almost got lost in the adjacent building when she was a kitten (around six months old).

What a way to start the year. I'm still in shock at the moment and have yet to move towards sadness. I still can't believe that Nian passed away so soon. She just turned four last February first. I treated them to chicken nuggets then. I have beautiful memories of the kitties esp. siblings Xin, Nian, Kuai, and Le. Now, there are only two left -- Xin & Le. 😔 All the kitties that are gone will always be cherished. 🙏❤️💡

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Prompt A Day : Quote

"What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality." - Plutarch

shoutout to @shadowspub for the daily prompt (subscribe to her newsletter)

Never stop growing or learning. Yeah, I'm reminded of that every so often. Right now, I need to deal with my loss. It's a slow process and I do admit I need healing. It's not just my kitties I'm talking about, but I'm still a long way from healing from Mom's loss. It's been almost four years. The pain is real, but my physical pain tops even my emotional ones. I suppose in a way, it's a blessing in disguise. There's something about physical pain that takes my mind off the other pain. I don't know if that makes sense at all. I'm working on it. I know that each day I work on my attitude and my mindset on how I view things. Yes, that includes how I deal with loss. One day at a time...

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I feel strange right now. ✌️ Like I said I feel like something flipped. I can't explain it, but I feel it. It's part of intuitive me. However, I'm going to trust the universe and its process, so I'm going to sit back and watch life unfold. 🙏❤️💡 On the lighter side of life, Murphy's Law was in effect earlier as my printer (of more than four years of working from home) suddenly wouldn't print well even after I changed the ink cartridge. The good news is I now have a newer printer. Hopefully, it will last long. 😅

I actively work on these affiliate sites daily. Right now the goal is to reach payout again on LL. I'm less than 70 cents away more or less. 😅

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All righty, it's time to wrap things up today. I need to recharge for another work day. I pray there wouldn't be any more unwelcome surprises tomorrow. I can only handle so much. 😝 Do enjoy your day. Nighty night from Manila. Ta-tah! 👋

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credits for the new signature : @stdd

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My books are now available:

Never Bother

Don't You Cry No More

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_{DYCNM Book cover design by @viking-ventures
More credits: Commissioned Cover 1, part 3 - Viking Visual Art Tutorial
NB Book cover design by @ilovewintergem}

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Documenting my life's journey:

My main blog ===> Fresh Start

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