The Passage of Time
Remembering someone who for natural reasons had to leave, with no health challenges, just the passing of one day after another, as well as waiting for something greater to happen in your life. Living each moment in that daily accompaniment in a contemplative way makes the difference of each step into the mysterious world of leaving the physical body.
Sleepless nights, without the intervention of doctors diagnosing anything just to say something. Moments of sleeping, of being, of listening to words that the one who makes the company does not know what happens, in his immediate thought, although after long months he links moments, words, situations that make him draw conclusions about life and death.
That take-off that everyone fears and always comes, at any time, any hour, any day, the least expected... something like waiting and not wanting to reach it. An immense loneliness felt days before the event, I could not find anyone to keep us company as I expressed to my mother, at least for a while to accompany us, one of those nights I felt so lonely, an immense emptiness only I know of that feeling, seeing only my mother and me, remembering her look because she also felt the need to see someone else, she wanted to see me accompanied before such an event that was coming.
Remembering her face, her look, her loose words, is an immense emptiness inside me. Moments that I only lived with her, although each one of my siblings from where they were in their spaces, miles away, knew it anyway, the end was approaching for that physical body that gave everything in the journey of life she lived. He gave life, cared for lives, faithfully protected his loved ones, his loyalty was so great, that only his mission in this earthly world understood him.
Feelings, emotions, memories that each one from his space lives it, feels it from his experiences, from his perception, from his love towards that being who gave everything for each one of his children. Each one will remember in their minds and hearts those moments when the unconditional love of a mother was present.
Today I think of her, how many things she kept silent, her sufferings towards the events that happened to each of her children and she did not know how to help, but at different times she was judged without understanding the nature of her actions and the way she manifested her love.
Today I remember her smile, her joy when she came home and showed me the pots of food to celebrate the meeting, my children remember her when she led them to the fridge to see what she had there: jelly, candy, cake, it was her way of embracing them with her love.
How many words were left unsaid, how many hugs to give, how many conversations where she showed herself as she was, listening to her without judging, just listening to her. A few months have passed, today her face from my mind does not depart.
Now I think of all the connection theories explained in a scientific way, that I talk to her and she listens to me, we belong to the same clan and I was chosen among all her children to be the one to accompany her in this take-off journey as I call it.
I also think that the more time passes it seems that the connection is stronger, even though those of us who are left fulfilling our mission continue with our lives, there come those moments of hearing that Here I am, remember me. I don't think of her with sadness, I just dedicate moments of silence to feel her, I tell her that her path is always full of light.
Original content property of the author
Photograph property of the author from her personal gallery, on date 2020/02/02
Dividers
Translated with DeepL.com (free version)
Original content property of the author
Photograph property of the author from her personal gallery, on date 2020/02/02
Dividers
Translated with DeepL.com (free version)
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