Becoming A Better Me
We all have that one habit sometimes small, often something simple that quietly but profoundly changes the sphere of our lives. For some, it’s waking up early to seize the day; for others, journaling to untangle the mind’s chaos; or exercising to boost energy and confidence. For me, it was learning to say “no” more often.
How It All Began
For month, I was the quintessential “yes” person. I said yes to every request, every invitation, every favor, even when my plate was overflowing. I wanted to be helpful, supportive, and liked. But slowly, I realized this habit was draining me physically, mentally, and emotionally. I was exhausted, overwhelmed, and losing sight of my own priorities.
The turning point came during a particularly hectic period when I was juggling academics and exam tension deadlines, social commitments, and family obligations. I was stretched thin, stressed, and on the verge of burnout. My mother noticed and gently advised me: “You don’t have to say yes to everything, don't inconveniences yourself for someone else. Saying no is a form of self-respect.”
That simple advice sparked a shift. I started saying no to minor requests that didn’t align with my goals or values. It was uncomfortable and challenging at first, but with practice, it became empowering.
The Impact of Saying “No”
More Time and Energy for What Matters
By saying No to distractions and unnecessary obligations, I reclaimed precious time and energy. This allowed me to focus on my passions, career growth, and meaningful relationships.
Improved Mental Health
Setting boundaries reduced my stress levels and feelings of overwhelm. I felt more in control and less anxious, which improved my overall well-being.
Stronger Relationships
Ironically, saying no improved my relationships. People respected my honesty and boundaries, and I was able to be fully present when I did say yes.
Increased Self-Confidence
Each time I said no, I reinforced my self-worth and learned to trust my instincts or would I say decision. This boosted my confidence in making decisions that serve me best.
Greater Productivity and Focus
With fewer distractions, I became more productive and focused. I could dedicate quality time to my goals without guilt or burnout.
How did I start saying “No” more often:
I pause before I give respond: Giving myself permission to think before saying yes or no.
Being Polite but Firm: You don’t have to over-explain. A simple, “Thank you for asking, but I can’t commit right now,” works wonders.
Prioritizing my values: Align my yeses and noes with what truly matters to me.
I Practice Self-Compassion: It’s okay to say no without feeling guilty. Your well-being comes first.
Saying no isn’t about being selfish; it’s about honoring your time, energy, and priorities. This habit quietly transformed my life by creating space for growth, joy, and balance. It’s a simple yet powerful tool that anyone can adopt to reclaim control and live more intentionally.
Thanks for reading. Write up inspired by #hiveghana weekly prompt and Oluwadesire.
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I agree 💯 especially with the relationship aspect. I think there are friends I would have still had in my life if I had learned how to say no because at some point, it begins to feel like you over promise but under deliver.
Yeah
There are people that would make you feel that way
Like you need them for you to get some things done and when they ask for favor
All they expect is your Yes but life doesn’t work that way
If you keep doing it, you would see you are not getting fulfilled in some way