It is a crime to be a female child?

Ladies are nothing but a blessing to the whole, but some culture and traditions made it looks the opposite.

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I have always asked this question and have not gotten any reasonable answers from people. I have to come to a level where I provided an answer for myself. I don't really care anymore what people think or say or even do about who I am. I love who I am and how God made me. If you are not okay with that, it becomes your business and not mine. This is where I am today and it has helped me a lot. I no longer have problems with people for being who I am.

Talking about culture, the Igbo people believe so much in male children more than they believe in female children. Before now if a man have five girls without having a boy, it is seeing as if he don't have a child. There is this adage in my place that says that an Igbo man prefers a disabled male child than a complete female who is sound all round. I don't really know how to put it here, but the simple explanation that I can give is that male children are preferred more than the female children. Though I know that it has reduced to a level, but is still very well in existence till today.

It happened that my mother don't have any surviving male child. All her male children died at early age. I never met anyone of them because they all came before me. I am the last born and also the eleventh child. The reason why she gave birth to me was because she needed a male child badly to secure her place in her husband's family. Can you imagine that rubbish. So if a woman Don't have any male children, her space is still vacant. Hmmm!

I saw the way my mother was treated as a child and I earnestly prayed to God that when I finally get married I don't want to have only female. I prayed and asked that instead of only female I need only male. I wasn't doing that because I don't like female children, but because of what the culture of our people have done to us. My mother died not having anything property to her name just because she had only female children. I watched that and never wished for that in my own family.

This image belongs to me.

The ill treatment affected we the children. My uncle had six boys and four girls. Everyone around us treated both him and his children with high esteem, but what did we get? Neglect. Everyone did not even noticed that we existed. When ever someone sent anything to the large family, we were not notice when sharing. At most we will just be given a little out of it. But my uncle and his family get the whole package while we watched with tears. Most times when I was smaller I asked God so many times why he created me a female. I wished back then that I was a boy. But no more. I love the fact that I am a female and I adore all my female children as well as the male children. Though I have more male than female children, but I don't see that as something. I see all my children as equal as the way God made them. Every child is a blessing. I don't see anyone less.

HOW TO OVERCOME SUCH?

Start from yourself. Treat yourself the way you want others to treat you. I decided to love myself and treat myself with all the respect and care I expect from others. Self love is not selfishness. It is called self love. I love myself and you should do the same.